no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
