I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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