So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
