I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
