He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
