I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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