IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
