I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize
