let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
