her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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