His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
