we're blogging at a bar
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
