I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
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