Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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