Can Purell be used as lube?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
