Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
