We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
