he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
