Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Randomize
