GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
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