We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Randomize
