HIV tests are more positive than that guy
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
