I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Less talking, more tequila
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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