why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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