i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
