Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
