she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
