Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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