I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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