I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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