Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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