I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize
