he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
