can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Randomize
