But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
