i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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