I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
