Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Do you remember whose house we're in?
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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