The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
