I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
