We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
