Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
