As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize