Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
you didnt know i had herpes?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
