we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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