The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
