i just google imaged poop.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Randomize
