Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
