sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
