the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
