Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
This toilet bowl is my home.
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